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If you've been feeling constantly overwhelmed — like your mind won't slow down or you're always trying to catch up — you're not alone.

For many people, overwhelm isn't just about having too much to do. It's about what's happening internally, too.

It Often Starts with Your Thoughts

One of the biggest contributors to overwhelm isn't always your schedule — it's your internal dialogue.

Deb Hemgesberg, our telehealth clinician at Unity Counseling, frames it this way: "Your thoughts control your feelings, which control your behavior. What is the story you tell yourself?"

The way we think about situations can amplify stress quickly. If your mind is constantly running through worries, expectations, or self-criticism, it can make everything feel heavier.

Deb also points to something else important: "What is your self-care like?"

Because overwhelm isn't just about what's happening — it's also about how supported you are while it's happening.

How Stress Shows Up in Daily Life

Stress doesn't always look like stress.

It can show up in ways that feel disconnected or hard to trace back, like:

  • anxiety or constant worry

  • trouble sleeping

  • overeating or changes in appetite

  • conflict in relationships

  • memory or focus issues

  • miscommunication

  • increased reliance on coping behaviors

As Deb shares, it can also look like "engaging in addictions — phones, screens, food, substances, risky behavior."

These aren't random patterns. They're often the ways we try to cope when overwhelm has built up beyond what we can carry — which is exactly why slowing down can feel so hard.

Why It's So Hard to Slow Down

You might tell yourself to "just relax" or "slow down," but actually doing that can feel nearly impossible.

Sometimes, staying busy is part of the pattern.

"It might be that we keep busy to distract ourselves — and slowing down is painful," Deb explains.

When we're constantly moving, we don't have to sit with what's underneath. Slowing down can bring up thoughts or feelings we've been avoiding.

Patterns That Keep Overwhelm Going

Over time, overwhelm often becomes tied to certain patterns that quietly reinforce themselves. Deb often sees:

  • poor or unclear boundaries

  • constant "head noise" or overthinking

  • lack of consistent self-care

  • relationships that don't feel affirming or supportive

Each of these patterns chips away at the resources we need to feel steady. Without clear boundaries, we keep saying yes when we mean no. Without consistent self-care, our reserves never refill. Without supportive relationships, we're carrying heavy things alone. And constant head noise crowds out the quiet we need to actually hear ourselves.

These patterns can make it harder to reset, recharge, or feel grounded — even when life slows down on the outside.

What to Understand About Stress

It can feel like overwhelm will last forever — but it won't.

"Nothing lasts forever," Deb reminds us. "Stress is your body's response to its experiences."

That distinction matters. Stress isn't proof that something is wrong with you. It's information — your body and mind communicating that something needs attention. Once you start hearing overwhelm as a signal rather than a verdict, the relationship shifts. You stop fighting yourself and start asking better questions: What is this trying to tell me? What do I actually need right now?

Signals can be understood, supported, and worked through.

You Don't Have to Stay Stuck Here

Feeling overwhelmed doesn't mean something is wrong with you — it often means something needs attention, support, or change.

With the right tools and support, it's possible to:

  • quiet the mental noise

  • build healthier boundaries

  • improve self-care

  • feel more grounded and in control

Getting Started 

If you've been feeling constantly overwhelmed, support is available.

Schedule an intake call to explore what that support could look like. As Deb puts it, "I'd be honored to walk this journey with you." She sees clients online and is currently accepting new clients.